today was about how much stress can be endured before failing.

the gardens were pummeled with HEAVY rains today. our senior arborist said we may lose more trees in this bout of rain. the lionshare of trees that were going to fail already have. i had walked the grounds to say "goodbye" to these trees. that may sound really wooo-woooo to many people. all i can say is that when you work around 500 year old trees - you get to respect them. they - old and saintly and resilient. me- frail and ephemeral and a bit dumb.

place your hand on a recently cut stump and you touch the inner life, the "insides" of a 500 year old entity. it is not really dead yet but rapidly receeding in life- (sometimes these stumps even send out shoots and resurrect.)

the movie "lord of the rings" depiction of treebeard connected with my experience of trees. i'm not an expert on Tolkien, mind you. but there is something about the mixture of caring and not caring about human scaled issues, the long view of matters and the gruff affectionate demenor of treebeard that i really respond to.

my personal life today is like a tree with roots grabbing onto a hillside while the torrent flows, the rains pour and the thunder rolls. it is yet to be seen if i will fail or hold on. i am ready for the storms to depart.

ADDITIONAL NEWS FLASH- the mirroring of professional and home life continues in brutal fashion - in the exterior landscape weather forcasts 15 inches of rain between now and tuesday... and in the interior landscape wednesday is a big armageddon day at our house.

pray.

pray.

pray.